True Freedom

Guess what?? I grew into my nose and my forehead. Well, maybe not, but mentally I did. When I was in middle school, I was BEYOND insecure about my looks. I felt inferior to my friends and, in my opinion, was shy and awkward. I am not sure what everyone else thought, but that did not matter. When it came to ME, I was blah. I remember a friend of mine (whose name I will not mention but she may be reading this and was a DOLL for trying) talked to a guy I had a crush on about me and reported back to me that he said "Her nose is too big!" Yeah, it stuck with me. Even when I got to high school, those words never went away. I did not dwell on it, but it never... went... away! I had great friends in high school though, and even though I felt awkward and like I did not fit in much, they never made me think that THEY felt that way. It is only NOW that I can look back and realize I was lucky for that. 

I am not sure at what point in my life this all changed, but it changed BIG TIME. I love my nose. :-) And my forehead. What is not to love? Yes, Elleah looks a lot like her daddy, but when I look at her, I see a lot of myself as well, and she is perfect!!! So how dare me think anything about myself that may cause me to be hard on myself. I have become comfortable with who I am. I am honest about who I am. I am serious and silly, and definitely have my moments... both the blonde variety and the bitchy variety. I speak before thinking, and even though my body has suffered a tragic loss after Elleah, I still rock my swimsuit at the beach. I do not wear make up every day and I have been known to mosey up into Wal-Mart in my big tshirts and comfy pants. I do take pride in myself but I have become comfortable with what is realistic for myself.... and so even though I may look a-mess sometimes, I take pride in WHY I look that way. 

I think that this is TRUE FREEDOM. When you reach a point in your life where what others have to say about you and what they may think about you does not matter, that is an amazing feeling. I know that most of us say "Oh I do not care what other people think about me." But if you think SERIOUSLY to yourself if that statement is true, and it truly truly is, then you have true freedom. I think that there are times we steer away, but finding your way back to yourself is what it is all about. Right now, I feel that way. I am extremely content with being me and I hope I stay that way for a long long time (like as in FOREVER ;-)). 

I know a lot of people that spend their days thinking/saying/judging things that are so insignificant. And it is their right to do so. But this is not the kind of thing that I want to surround myself with. It is hard to stay content and happy when there are so many negative nellys out there. And while facebook is awesome, I think that it is time for me to step away for a little while. Gradually. And by basically saying bye-bye to people as their negativity is shown (whether it is shown ON fb or in person). Most of you won't even see the difference though, because most of you are amazing people!! :-P  

.....You Might Be a Mommy.

This one is for all you mom's out there!! OR for those of you that just get IT!! The past week or so, I have been posting "you might be a mommy" lines! Ya know, kinda like Jeff Foxworthy's "you might be a redneck" lines. As I have said a BILLION times, being a mom is the greatest experience, and also a very educational one. TWO years and I have learned more than I did in the previous 25 years of my life. So here are a few of my personal experiences where I said "omg, I KNOW I am a Mommy now." (ps-I am adding the ones a few of my friends have posted too)


If you have ever watched an entire TV show on mute.... you might be a mommy.
If you can keep a rocking chair RoCkInG while drifting away into a dead sleep.... you might be a mommy.
If you pray more than 6 times a day..... you might be a mommy.
If your prayers usually start with "Please God" in lieu of "Dear God" ...you might be a mommy.
If you have ever crawled on your hands a knees out of a room to avoid being seen above the bed level....you might be a mommy.
If you are willing to exchange cookies for silence..... you might be a mommy.
If you hear the word "poop" before your eyes are completely open in the morning.... you might be a mommy. (thank you Lisa)
If you are home EVERYDAY between 1-4pm.... you might be a mommy. *crucial nap times*
If you are planning an awesome party, and the theme centers around a cartoon character... you might be a mommy. (thank you Lisa)
If you cuss bedroom doors for making that "creaking" noise.... you might be a mommy. 
If you think 6am is entirely too early and insanely inappropriate for the garbage man to be in the neighborhood... you might be a mommy.
If you think that 1-4pm is an inappropriate time for the mail to be delivered....you might be a mommy.
If you can make an apple pie with one hand..... you might be a mommy.
If you can do almost anything with one hand.... you might be a mommy.
If 78% of your camera roll consists of blurry shots.... you might be a mommy (of a toddler for sure).
If you consider a night on the town going to the grocery store alone.... you might be mommy.
If you have ever woken up in the morning with extra people in your bed.... you might be a mommy.
If you have never called a pacifier a "pacifier"... you might be a mommy.
If you have ever held out your hands to catch vomit.... you might be a mommy.
If your "me time" consists of the 15 minutes it takes you to clean the kitchen... you might be a mommy.
If you call your husband "daddy".... you might be a mommy. 
If you have ever FAKED needing to go to the bathroom just to get some peace.... you might be a mommy.
If anything you might possibly need can be found on the floorboard of your backseat.... you might be a mommy. 
If you have ever crawled on the floor at 2am searching for a paci like your life depended on it.... you might be a mommy.
If you are in the car alone for a full 15 min before you realize Toddler Tunes is playing on CD player..... you might be a mommy. 
If you have cheerios in the bottom of your purse and it does not phase you to just leave them there.... you might be a mommy.
If the loud, obnoxious noise in a restaurant is coming from your table.... you might be a mommy.
If you have even gone 3 days without remembering to take a shower.... you might be a mommy. 
If you head out on a road trip and snuggle in the car to a mickey pillow and winnie the pooh blanket... you might be a mommy. (thank you Michelle)
If gifts are always being sent to your house and none of them are for you... you might be a mommy.
If preparations for a nice relaxing bath consists of removing toy boats and rubber aquatic animals that squirt water.... you might be a mommy.
If you ever thought having kids was a stupid, crazy, idiotically wonderful idea... you might be a mommy. 


I could go on... and maybe I will one day! ;-) 


Please remember... these are "you MIGHT be a mommy"! I am sure some of you with NO kids call your husband "daddy!" But that is just weird. And I am sure some of you with NO kids also think that 6am is too early for the garbage man. Call your city officials, but do not lessen my meaning for posting that! lol.